Our behaviour does not define us

During the course of my life, I have exhibited many different behaviours. These behaviours include getting angry, insulting people, taking things very personally, ignoring people, being depressed, being selfish, being accommodating, pleasing people, having fun, being joyful, denying love, accepting love… and the list continues…

At the time, these behaviours defined me. I assumed and I judged myself based on these behaviours, especially the negative behaviours. I thought myself to be not a very nice person. An evil person. I thought myself to be a looser and failure as a result of these behaviours.

I have learnt that these behaviours do not define me. They do not define who I am. If my behaviour does not define me, then what defines me.Who am I? What am doing here? If I am not my behaviour then why do I exhibit these negative traits? When someone hurts me and I want to exact revenge, that makes me a bad person, does it not? When I am hurt and refuse to forgive the person that hurt me, am I not being the bad person?

If my behaviour does not define me, then what defines me? My soul defines, my inner voice defines, my purpose defines me… When someone hurts me and the pain is, unbearable all I want to do to lash back, all I want to do is hurt them back. Every fibre in my body wants to do that. I feel the pain in my soul and I want to lash back from deep inside me. Does that not define me? Does that not make me a revengeful person?

Now when this happens I sit back and I ask myself what purpose does this serve? Staying with revenge for being hurt. What purpose does taking revenge serve? I want the other person to feel the pain I am feeling. And, what purpose would that serve? They will feel how much pain they caused me. And, what purpose does that serve? They will not do it again. As I go through this question I start relating it to me. What purpose does it serve for me? If they will not it again, what purpose would that serve for me? I am respected. And what purpose does that serve for me? I am caring. And what purpose does that serve for me? I am love. And what purpose does that serve me? Andas I continue doing this I get to the point where I cannot get to a higher purpose, or the higher purpose repeats itself. Then I know I have reached who I am… and this then defines who I am… do this often enough and you start seeing a trend and this trend is who I am and what defines me.

If my behaviour does not define me, then what defines me? The purpose for exhibiting the behaviour defines. My highest intention for exhibiting that behaviour defines me. When I get to understand more of what my highest purpose and intentions are, the more my behaviour starts changing. The more I start exhibiting behaviours that is congruent to my highest intention. When I stop at just revenge, then those are the only behaviours that I exhibit, and I feel bad… Find your highest intention and purpose for exhibiting a behaviour you do not like and as you do watch that behaviour redefine itself and notice how your life becomes more enjoyable and fulfilling.